You're out of your element Donnie

Tina Fey's scar mystery revealed

2008-12-01T14:59:00.001-08:00

I have a crush on Tina so this is MAJOR NEWS.

Tina was attacked by a stranger when she was 5.

We now return you to regularly scheduled blog.

24: Redemption not so redeeming

2008-11-24T11:34:00.001-08:00

Did anyone else HATE the 24 premiere/movie/waste of time that aired on Sunday?

Not many people did. Apparently it had heavy competition from the Colts-Chargers game on NBC and the American Music Awards on NBC.

If you missed it, you didn't miss much. Here are my thoughts:

Africa looks a lot like the San Fernando Valley.

Jack gave a scarf that he bought for his daughter to a 10-year-old boy instead. So is it a girl's scarf or a boy's scarf? The kid sure loved it, enough to run back for it when he lost it and indirectly kill his own teacher.

There are moles and traitors everywhere...just like every other season of 24!

Jack didn't do anything very clever. He shot some bad guys, lied to another guy (and killed him with his legs, which was pretty cool) and then took a bunch of kids on a field trip to the embassy. That's it!

And the outgoing President said some creepy, mysterious things to the incoming President. A thrilling scene.

I hope the new season doesn't suck like this movie did!

Anyone disagree?

Jennifer Garner in danger?

2008-11-19T12:44:00.000-08:00

Say it isn't so...

from TMZ

Jennifer Garner Fears for Her Safety

Funny history girl

2008-11-19T12:34:00.000-08:00

I think I love this Holly girl. She has a lot to teach me.

Judd Apatow wants you to be in his movie!

2008-11-14T09:23:00.000-08:00

Judd Apatow's movie Funny People comes out in July 2009.

Thanks, Molly!

2008-11-14T09:13:00.000-08:00

Thanks for the shout-out, Molly.

In return:

Hey, everyone! If you need help promoting websites or products or viral videos (or awesome blogs like this one) hire this awesome blogger!

Also, please tell me how you can throw 400 yards for 3 touchdowns and no interceptions and still lose. At home.

Speak of the Devil Review

2008-10-30T00:32:00.001-07:00

What if the horrifically forgettable show “Reaper” got wasted one night and found itself on the wrong side of town with “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia”? What if after more than a few drinks, one thing led to another, and the next morning brought with it more than just a horrible hangover and a lifetime of regrets.

The bastard love child between these two shows would pretty much sum up the premise of the short “Speak of the Devil” directed and co-written by Michael Caissie. Caissie keeps the story moving, gets some solid performances from his cast, and doesn’t try to get too cute with the somewhat simple premise.

In keeping with the similar story line of “Reaper”, one that involves the owing of a soul to a less than holy being, “Speak of the Devil” doesn’t exactly scream originality. However, adding the crude humor and overwhelmingly shallow character traits found in “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” does make “Speak of the Devil” more prone to actual laughter.

The poor fool indebted to the devil, Ryan, is daftly played by Timothy Mahony. I wouldn’t venture to say that there is actually a straight man to lead us through the chaos that ensues, but Mahony’s Ryan is about as close as we are going to get. He’s handsome, charming , and posses admirable comic timing.

Ryan sold his soul to save his dying friend Tucker, played by co-writer Charles Huttinger. Mr. Huttinger bares it all (literally I might add) and is able to land a few laughs as the overwhelming dimwit of the group. Tucker and Pete, the final member of the duo played by Jonas Sansone, certainly call for the age old saying, “with friends like these…who needs enemies”. Sansone is natural and fluid in his performance, his subtle interpretations of the humor allows him to steal more than a few scenes.

The Devil, good ole Beelzeebub himself, is played by polished character actor Michael Cornacchia. Cornacchia performance is well layered, and as his comic timing goes, so do the scenes. Mr. Cornacchia effortlessly breezes between the empowered Dark Lord, and a bumbling idiot desperate for the friendship of this retarded trio. His performance is so strong, that it unfortunately seems out of place in this average piece.

When the closing credits rolled at the Los Angeles screening I attended I felt “Speak of the Devil” provided a satisfactory delivery of what I had expected from this comedy short; a simple story line with a few laughs. Mr. Caissie didn’t re-invent the wheel here; he just got in the driver seat, and safely drove us down a familiar street.

Stay tuned for more of my LA shorts reviews.

Is James Franco funny - or is he just high?

2008-10-27T15:26:00.000-07:00

Three different people have sent me this strange video:

One thinks it's a "normal" tribute video that Hollywood types make for each other, like Tom Cruise making a speech about his agent for the agent's 50th birthday; one thinks it's totally fake and just a joke; and one isn't sure. I'm in that category too.

I Googled various things mentioned in the video, and Aidan Weinglas is a real person who really does work at a reality TV company called WonderGlen in Los Angeles.

But...the video seems too weird to be real. Is it a joke? Is James Franco trying to make fun of the guy? Who's laughing at who?

Send theories if you have them.

Policewomen in the 70's and "Life on Mars"

2008-10-27T15:13:00.000-07:00

Love Life on Mars.

Loved the British version and am digging the American redux. But I was curious about something.

In the show, Gretchen Mol plays Annie, a member of the "policewomen's bureau." She tells Sam Tyler, the main character, that PWB handls "lost kittycats, hysterical girlfriends," and sort of acts as a paramedic sometimes.

Was this real? Did policewomen really not carry weapons and only deal with "feminine" issues, even in 1973 New York?

I dug around and found this interesting answer at the History of Police Women in New York section of the NYC Police Museum website. (http://www.nycpolicemuseum.org/html/tour/wip_web.htm)

The Women’s Bureau was established in 1924 and renamed the Bureau of Policewomen six years later. Policewomen assigned to the Bureau performed matron duties, participated in undercover work, investigated charges of sexual assault, searched female corpses, took abandoned babies to shelters, and protected women and children by patrolling in plainclothes at beaches, movie houses, and schools. Each Policewoman carried her own .32 revolver which was smaller than the men’s .38.

The Bureau of Policewomen also responded to requests for Policewomen made by other units of the NYPD. In 1964, for instance, the Bureau received 311 requests. That same year, members of the Bureau of Policewomen made 1,050 arrests. As Lieutenant Lucy Acerra, who worked in the Bureau, wrote: “The New York Policewomen’s Bureau had taken on all the characteristics of a small police department within a larger one.”

In 1967, 180 women from the Bureau of Policewomen were assigned to precincts. The duties of the Policewomen at the precincts continued to consist primarily of searching women prisoners, guarding children, and performing clerical work. This decentralization of the majority of the Policewomen was a precursor to the dissolution of the Bureau which occurred on August 15, 1973.

[In 1973], The Bureau of Policewomen was disbanded and the titles of “Policewoman” and “Policeman” were officially consolidated to “Police Officer.” More than 350 female Police Officers were hired and trained, more than half of whom were assigned to patrol duties. Height regulations were dropped, “unisex” physical tests for those competing to become Police Officers were implemented, and a new standardized “unisex” uniform was mandated.

Courage & Supidity Short Film Review

2008-10-23T11:14:00.001-07:00

Courage & Stupidity Short Film Review
Movie Courage & Stupidity Posted By: / Source

So the good folks at Ranchero Entertainment sent me a copy of Courage & Stupidity. Came home and was going to review another film but figured I would pop this bad boy in and give it a peak. I am quite impressed to say the least.

Courage & Stupidity is a comedy inspired by Steven Spielberg and his early years as an up and coming filmmaker. Set in the early 1970's, Steven has a major studio deal to direct a movie about a killer shark and is confident that his experience will be a breeze. Conflicts arise after Steven and his pal George (based on George Lucas) accidentally destroy the movie’s main prop--a mechanical shark.

The next day, the giant fish sinks to the ocean floor and it looks as if the director's career has gone with it. Steven must stop the film's producers from pulling the plug and find a way to make his monster movie without a monster. Although inspired by public information, the truth is that Mr. Spielberg has never harmed nor would he ever harm a mechanical fish.

To start with the packaging was top notch on this dvd. When you buy a dvd you want great packaging. As you will remember I was ranting over the cheap dvd slip covers some big studios are now using. Well this 22minute short film came in a really nice case, with a really nicely designed cover art. Well done.

The movie itself is not indie at all. The soundtrack is excellent and complimentary. The actual film itself is all shot on 35mm and it shows. This movie isnt really a comedy but for those who love Spielberg and Lucas or Jaws for that matter you will giggle and chuckle during certain scenes. For a short film I give this movie a 9/10. It is one of the finest short films to ever show up on my door. The story wont appeal to people who are not fans of Spielberg or Lucas in my opinion, but fine work is still fine work. The camera work is excellent, the story well written and the acting is very good for the most part.

Big studios and directors need to take an example from Darin Beckstead who wrote and directed this short. I would encourage people to check it out, it can be bought at http://www.courageandstupidity.com/ You can also check out the trailer to see the quality here

Dead Bones - Review

2008-10-23T11:10:00.000-07:00

Review by: Todd Brown

2008 is the year of the horror-western, apparently, and one that we have been tracking for quite some time here is Swiss director Olivier Beguin’s twenty minute short Dead Bones, which has just premiered at the Sitges Festival. What do we learn from this film? There is a reason why people might be inclined to name a town Dead Bones, dammit, and maybe it’d be best if you just went ahead and rode around it.

The film tells the story of a bounty hunter who rides into a remote town in pursuit of a pair of criminals only to discover the town itself is far more dangerous than his quarry. Shot on location using the still-existing Spanish sets that hosted the large majority of spaghetti westerns through the 1970’s Dead Bones has a remarkably authentic and cinematic quality to it, and full marks go to Beguin for having the good sense to start things off right by going back to the land that made westerns popular in the first place.

As is often the case with a project such as this in which virtually everybody involved is working outside of their first language - it’s shot in English with a multi-ethnic cast and crew - the rhythms of the dialog can feel forced and unnatural in places but Beguin shows his chops in a pair of extended set pieces that crank up the tension nicely: an underground chase through a series of tunnels with bounty hunter and prey chained together at the wrist and an extended, tightly choreographed outdoor gun battle. Also very noteworthy are the stellar gore effects, the first gouts of blood splattered on the screen by Cannibal Holocaust director Ruggero Deodata, appearing in an extended cameo.

Tribeca 2008 Short Film Reviews

2008-10-23T11:07:00.000-07:00

TRIBECA 2008 Short Films Review

Reviews by: Tobe A. Roberts IV

Last Time in Clerkenwell (4 min): Animation, Comedy
The Royal Bird Legion has its sights set on world domination.
Paired with the musical overtones, Clerkenwell is expertly produced. The black and white contrast cinematically creates a rigidity and martinet qualities that the legion possesses. Well done and just purely entertaining. ****

Kirksdale (22 min.): Horror
A Southern mental hospital is the stage for horror at Kirksdale Hospital.
This is a nail biting film, with all the makings for a fright fest. Musically, it sets the tone with suspenseful moments which build to a climax. Acting is above par, and I consider it a heavy hitter in the short film competition. Set in rural 1960s, Florida, the eeriness and sadistic overtones is classic horror at its best. ****

Zombie Gets a Date (3 min): Animation, Kids
A Zombie and his not so enthralled dinner date.
Tensions are high as this undead single is looking for amor. Really entertaining and funny. In fact, the premise is enough to get you laughing and hooked. *** ½

The Aviatrix (10 min.): Science Fiction/Supernatural, Drama
A woman faced with life and death combats her affliction in the form of her intergalactic fantasy life.
Visual FX was promising, and plot-wise was interesting, however, it never got off the launch pad. The dialogue was flatter than one month old soda which made the film crash and burn. **

Yellow Sticky Notes (6 min): Animation
Life as expressed in yellow sticky notes.
Cleverly crafted, “Yellow Sticky Notes”, takes us on the journey of the filmmaker and his life reflected in these can’t be without memory savers. Set to music, we follow his film career path, and interpersonal relationships along the way. Using only a single black pen and these 2300 + post-it pads, the depth of storytelling is evident. It’s sheer rawness creates its appeal. Resourcefulness is the mother of new phenomenal films. *****

Goldfish (13 min): Comedy, Youth
Two third grade girls take on a mission to save imprisoned goldfish.
Suzy and Jenny take their mission seriously to liberate school goldfish. After viewing “Finding Nemo” nearly a dozen or so times, it’s their duty to send the fish back to their parents who they think are searching the entire ocean for their offspring. Hilarious story. Great acting which was reminiscent of “Ferris Bueller”. Mindy Sterling (“Austin Powers”) plays the girls’ teacher who first cautions the students about their captive fish. Great film! *****

New Boy (11 min): Coming of Age, Drama
It’s tough being the new boy in school.
Based on a short story, this story about a nine year old boy from Africa, named Joseph who struggles with trying to fit in his new school. Silent yet aware of everything around him, Joseph’s inner spirit and heart is ironclad. Adapting to his new surroundings and being the only child of color in his class, has made him a target for class bullies. Standing proud of where he came from (with flashbacks at his old school with his father), Joseph’s defiant nature while standing up to these bullies, causes the tide to turn in his favor. Wonderfully told without being verbose, “Newboy”, is a coming of age film, not to be forgotten. **** 1/2

Video shows that hunters are crazy

2008-10-20T10:03:00.000-07:00

My college friend Jeff, who's a hunter, sent this to me. It's some kind of award tribute video from a hunters association in South Africa.

It's almost so weird that it seems like a joke. Some of the titles and facts in the video check out, and Pieter Voorhees is a real person (a reality TV producer), but is that really Charlize Theron narrating? I don't get it.

You decide.

Top 3 Albums of My Youth

2008-10-16T16:12:00.000-07:00

Here they are...and YES I grew up in the 90's!!

1. Alice in Chains "Dirt"

This album is just so raw. I still listen to it today and I'm amazed at how unique the sound is, along with how they were able to make pain and misery somehow sound so beautiful.

2. Nirvana "Nevermind"

Seemed to embody everything I was feeling at the time. It was strong and aggressive but Kurt's vocals told a story of being completely lost and lonely.

3. Guns N' Roses "Appetite for Destruction"

When I first heard this album I truly felt like I was hearing music for the first time. They were everything rock stars should be, and I felt like they were kind enough to take me along for the ride!

My take on a bunch of new TV shows

2008-10-10T16:05:00.000-07:00

This season hasn't been so great for TV. Maybe it's the lingering effects from the writers' strike, or the fears of an actors' strike, or the fact that fiction can't compete with the incredible tragi-comedy that is the 2008 election.

Eleventh Hour: Liked it the first time I saw it. When it was called House.

I've watched a bunch of pilots and premieres and am prepared to share my thoughts with the world:

Kath and Kim: Better in Australia. Wa-a-a-a-y better. Molly Shannon, why aren't you funny anymore? Selma Blair...where have you been? 'Cause you can go back there.

My Own Worst Enemy: It's bold to put "worst" in your title. I liked the Russian hottie in the opening sequence. But I think I'll watch Chuck instead. Or any James Bond movie.

Crusoe: Another delicious actress, this time playing a pirate wench. Could she and Natasha from MOWE just have their own show?

The Ex List: I bet I would like this show if I was a chick. Or Israeli. No offense intended! It's adapted from an Israeli show! Just like KiK is from Australia and EH is from Britian. See a pattern?

Knight Rider: Val Kilmer sounds stoned, I don't like the leading guy (whatever his name is) and the show feels like one long Ford commercial. About as bad as Bionic Woman, another action show NBC ruined by remaking.

True Blood: Vampires = gays. I get it. So is The L Word really about werewolves?

Sanctuary: I'm beginning to feel that Battlestar Galactica (and possibly Doctor Who) is an exception to the rule. The rule being that everything on the Sci-Fi Channel is crap.

Disagree? Have more bad shows to add to the list? Let me hear it.

2008-10-07T12:00:00.000-07:00

Megan Fox has been all over the press recently because of Eagle Eye.

I have to say, I was never a big fan, but I've converted. I'm now putting Megan Fox in my top

five. Who are the others, you ask? Let's take a look!

5. Megan Fox. It may just be media overload, but if that's the case...thanks, media.

4. Kate Winslet. For one reason, she usually gets naked in her movies. For another reason, she's a class, respectable Oscar-nominee and is, many ways, everything Megan is not. And did she ever look better than with those red ringlet curls in Titanic?

3. Elisha Cuthbert. Always attractive on 24, amazingly sexy in The Girl Next Door (you haven't seen it?) and truly mouth-watering in some of her photo spreads like this:

2. Monica Keena. She plays Kristen on Entourage and is a refreshing change from the skinny skeletons of shows like 90210. She has some flesh on her, and curves, and is in no way fat (some people think curves = fat). I'm a bit worried because I've heard rumors her breasts are fake. This photo doesn't help matters. Still, she's gorgeous.

1. Scarlett Johansson. Insanely beautiful. No argument, no debate, no doubt. Ryan Reynolds may be the luckiest man on Earth.

It's almost Halloween

2008-10-03T13:41:00.000-07:00

And because it's that time, here's my list of my top 10 favorite horror movies of all time. There is no method to my madness outside of the fact that it is madness...my madness. So enjoy it, or don't, comment and tell me your own favs. Really, I don't care.

1. A Nightmare on Elm Street - Saw it as a young kid, scared the crap out of me then, still does now.

2. Halloween (the original!) - I think this is a masterpiece that even Hitchcock would have been proud of.

3. Psycho - Classic still stands up.

4. Texas Chainsaw Massacre (Original) - This movie is just so gruesome, and if you take in to consideration the year it came out - Ouch!

5. Scream - I know I know, it doesn't look like it belongs up here, but remember this is my list, and this movie scared the shit out of me as a teenager!!

6. Aliens - Another movie I saw waaaaay too young, that has stuck to me and my NIGHTMARES!

7. The Exorcist - This movie was a lot higher before I saw the re-release in the theater. Everyone was laughing and it just showed me that the movie hasn't held up as well as I had originally thought.

8. Friday the 13th - I think this movie is under appreciated. I watched it recently and saw a lot of traditional classic horror elements.

9. Saw - This one made my list because it was so fresh, and I hadn't really seen anything like it. It was disturbing, and has a lot of thriller elements to it that kept me squirming on the edge of my seat.

10. Silence of the Lambs - This movie, as a movie, is ranked way higher for me, but as a horror film it didn't top the ones above it. I think where it does excel though, is that it was so psychological and well done from an acting stand point, that I think people will still be talking about it years from now.